I’m Just Choosing

I wish to fly 
I’m unloading 
I’m not insensitive 
I’m just choosing 


It’s just another week.
It’s been a regular month.
It’s an ordinary weather.
It’s an average list of chores.
It’s the daily hum-drum.
It’s the same faces around.
But,
But I’m making the most of it.
I’m trying to make my state-of-mind extraordinary.
I’m day dreaming travel and researching hostels.
I’m considering my options and being hopeful for the long weekends.
I’m sprinkling plans and I know some are about to stick.
I’m making me.
I’m making myself happy.
I’m being more than just my immediate surroundings.
I wish to try
I’m learning
I’m not incoherent
I’m just choosing
Am I delusional, you may wonder.
I’m childish and dreamy you might say.
I’m unreliable you might believe.
But I’m happy Is all that I care.
I’m trying is all I know.
I’ll get my tickets stamped, is all that I need to believe.
Sure you wish I saw the reality that you see
I understand that you are uncomfortable with my antiques
You do genuinely try to make me normal
Everyone’s wishful for me to adhere and conform
But I’ve seen people cry under the happy masks
I’ve heard the gloomy silence behind your crackling laughter
I’ve felt the burden of the unshed tears
And I know they weigh me down
I wish to fly
I’m unloading
I’m not insensitive
I’m just choosing

ATTITUDE

it is an energy neutral term and yet is most commonly thought/ used in a negative context

This week’s word is an energy neutral term and yet is most commonly thought and used in a negative context.

“ATTITUDE”

a point of view, vantage point, frame of mind or perspective of an individual or a group, towards another individual, thing or situation

A predisposition or a tendency to respond positively or negatively towards a certain idea, object, person, or situation. Attitude influences an individual’s choice of action, and responses to challenges, incentives, and rewards.

(as defined on BusinessDictionary)

The word attitude has always interested me, just the way a hot pan interests a child who has been specifically told not to touch it.

Look at the definition and meaning of this word people! Not once does any definition say that it’s about the unacceptable or negative behaviours or situations. And yet how often is it said “You have attitude”, “You better watch that attitude of yours”, “I don’t like him, he has an attitude” and on and on…

If Antoine de Saint-Exupery’s words about attitude-

“The meaning of things lies not in the things themselves, but in our attitude towards them”

are to be believed, then our attitude towards attitude is what needs our attention.

I’m not sure what started it, but the common connotation and usage of the word is heavily negative, even though it is something that helps distinguish one from another. Its as unique as personality.

Come to think of it, it feels like an elaborate sadistic scheme. Like one fine boring morning someone decided to make a list of words such as breasts, ATTITUDE, sensuality, menstruation, depression, etc. and met up with a bunch of buddies. He shared the list with them along with his plan- “I’m going to create a certain amount of discomfort around these words and lets see if it goes viral”. And it did! *face palm* *eyes rolling into my head*

The taboo on it is so strong that when we intend to use the word ‘attitude’ with a positive connotation we tend to used the word positive or a synonym of it to explain our context (good, bright, growth oriented, etc…).

Am I getting to any point with it?

NO

Well this is just my rant about a phenomenon that I refuse to understand.